[Rickenbacher39]

.
Employment experiences.

1. My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory.
I got canned. I couldn't concentrate.

2. Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack but I just couldn't hack it.
So they gave me the axe.

3. After that I tried to be a Tailor but I just wasn't suited for it.
Mainly because it was a sew-sew job.

4. Next I tried working in a Muffler Factory.
That was too exhausting.

5. Then I tried to be a Chef- figured it would add a little spice to my life.
I just didn't have the thyme.

6. Next I attempted to be a Deli Worker.
No matter how I sliced it I couldn't cut the mustard.

7. My best job was a Musician.
Eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy.

8. I studied a long time to become a Doctor
but I didn't have any patience.

9. Next was a job in a Shoe Factory.
I tried but I just didn't fit in.

10. I became a Professional Fisherman.
I discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.

11. I managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company.
The work was just too draining.

12. So then I got a job in a Health Club
but they said I wasn't fit for the job.

13. After many years of trying to find steady work I finally got a job as a Historian.
I realized there was no future in it.

14. My last job was working in Starbucks.
I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.

SO, I TRIED RETIREMENT AND FOUND THAT I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB

 

[Flash60601]

When I was in the Army, I was on an artillery crew, I was the ramrod man.
But then, they told me to shove it!

 

[kschilk]

I know a guy that drives truck for a company that transports donkeys. He must have a really fast truck 'coz every time I see him, he's haulin' ass.