Another Bersa Thunder vote. I Also have the Thunder 22, which is just more fun than human beings should be allowed to have. But for certain, Bersa really makes its bones in 380. If you can find it, they also make the Thunder Plus, which is an unheard-of-in-380 double stack that carries 15+1. Tnoutdoors9 does a nice review of it on youtube.
If she wants a dainty frame, I've been shopping pocket 380's, and the only modern one I've found with a safety is the S&W Bodyguard. Thought about stepping down to the Beretta Tomcat in .32 ACP. If your wife doesn't want to rack the slide, the tip-up barrel would obviate the need to do so. It does have a safety.
Waltherfan01... I can't belive the PT709 and the Thunder 380 have similar felt recoil. What cartridges are you firing? (my view may be colored because I used to drop the striker on the PT740. Boom indeed)