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  1. #1911
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    Quote Originally Posted by kschilk View Post
    Is it possible to make a dwarf feel small?
    I do not know.
    I have never felt one.
    bigC likes this.
    Remember:
    Life is short.
    Make sure you spend as much time as possible
    on the internet arguing with strangers about politics.






  2. #1912
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    Quote Originally Posted by william View Post
    For parasites I believe you need a fumigator.

    I have a para-sight on my 1911.
    taurustoter likes this.
    Keeper of The Pledge

    GCS d? s+: a+++ C++ UL++++ P+ L++ E W++ N++ o+ K- w
    O M-- V-- PS+++ PE++ Y++ PGP++ t 5++ X- R+ tv+ b++++ DI++++ D+
    G-- e+++ h---- r+++ y+++ PL++++

    ∀xx ∃xy | xx∇xy > 0

    If the Russians hacked Clinton's email then she is guilty of a felony for exposing classified information to a hostile government.

  3. #1913
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    A thief stuck a pistol in a man’s ribs and said, “Give me your money.”
    The gentleman, shocked by the sudden attack, said “You cannot do this, I’m a United States congressman!”
    The thief said, “In that case, give me my money!”
    Keeper of The Pledge

    GCS d? s+: a+++ C++ UL++++ P+ L++ E W++ N++ o+ K- w
    O M-- V-- PS+++ PE++ Y++ PGP++ t 5++ X- R+ tv+ b++++ DI++++ D+
    G-- e+++ h---- r+++ y+++ PL++++

    ∀xx ∃xy | xx∇xy > 0

    If the Russians hacked Clinton's email then she is guilty of a felony for exposing classified information to a hostile government.

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  5. #1914
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    Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?


    A: Your Honor.

    Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50?




    A: Senator.
    Keeper of The Pledge

    GCS d? s+: a+++ C++ UL++++ P+ L++ E W++ N++ o+ K- w
    O M-- V-- PS+++ PE++ Y++ PGP++ t 5++ X- R+ tv+ b++++ DI++++ D+
    G-- e+++ h---- r+++ y+++ PL++++

    ∀xx ∃xy | xx∇xy > 0

    If the Russians hacked Clinton's email then she is guilty of a felony for exposing classified information to a hostile government.

  6. #1915
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    Q: What do you call a bus full of politicians going over a cliff?

    A: A good start.
    taurustoter likes this.
    NULLI SECUNDUS

  7. #1916
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    A road engineer died tragically the other day, when he accidentally fell into a sinkhole while surveying a highway. He clearly didn't know his asphalt from a hole in the ground.

    I recently bought a shot glass that looks like a big toe so now I can tip toe through my two lips.

    I was hunting one day when a naked woman jumped out of the bushes in front of me. She coyly smiled and winked at me so I asked "are you game?" ...she replied "Absolutely" so I shot her.

    Why can't you hear raindrops and snowflakes screaming as they fall?
    Ammo will get you through times of no money, better than money will get you through times of no ammo.



    I miss my 286.

    #Neverwarren

    Welfare...funding the illegal drug trade since 1935.

  8. #1917
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    DIGITAL is older than you think. I've studied both religion and electronics, and it is my understanding that Moses had the first tablet that could connect with the cloud.


    But there are those who say the first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.
    Last edited by Flash60601; 11-12-2019 at 09:48 PM.
    You must be careful what you pretend to be, because in the end, you are what you pretend to be.
    ....................Kurt Vonnegut, in "Mother Night"

    All governments suffer a recurring problem: Power attracts pathological personalities. It is not that power corrupts but that it is magnetic to the corruptible. Such people have a tendency to become drunk on violence, a condition to which they are quickly addicted. . . . . . . . . . . . .. — Frank Herbert, Chapterhouse: Dune

  9. #1918
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    Why is it that everyone who is FOR abortion has already been born?
    DeltaBravoKS likes this.
    You must be careful what you pretend to be, because in the end, you are what you pretend to be.
    ....................Kurt Vonnegut, in "Mother Night"

    All governments suffer a recurring problem: Power attracts pathological personalities. It is not that power corrupts but that it is magnetic to the corruptible. Such people have a tendency to become drunk on violence, a condition to which they are quickly addicted. . . . . . . . . . . . .. — Frank Herbert, Chapterhouse: Dune

  10. #1919
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    Mrs. Flash's little nephew ate an alarm clock yesterday afternoon, piece-by-piece. It was very time consuming.
    You must be careful what you pretend to be, because in the end, you are what you pretend to be.
    ....................Kurt Vonnegut, in "Mother Night"

    All governments suffer a recurring problem: Power attracts pathological personalities. It is not that power corrupts but that it is magnetic to the corruptible. Such people have a tendency to become drunk on violence, a condition to which they are quickly addicted. . . . . . . . . . . . .. — Frank Herbert, Chapterhouse: Dune

  11. #1920
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    Mrs. Flash's sister just texted her: "Come on over, I just baked some synonym buns"

    Mrs. Flash texted her right back: "Oh, you mean just like grammar used to make when we were kids?"
    kschilk likes this.
    You must be careful what you pretend to be, because in the end, you are what you pretend to be.
    ....................Kurt Vonnegut, in "Mother Night"

    All governments suffer a recurring problem: Power attracts pathological personalities. It is not that power corrupts but that it is magnetic to the corruptible. Such people have a tendency to become drunk on violence, a condition to which they are quickly addicted. . . . . . . . . . . . .. — Frank Herbert, Chapterhouse: Dune

 

 

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