My First and Rather Amateurish Attempt At a Rant
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    My First and Rather Amateurish Attempt At a Rant

    First, please forgive my feeble attempt at a rant.
    I've never done this before and I am sure I made some mistakes.
    I can maintain anger for only so long and then I pull a groin muscle.
    Right now I can walk in circles only in a clockwise direction.
    If I pull a muscle on the other side I am in big trouble.


    <<< clears throat >>>

    We have one tv channel available on our digital antenna.
    We use it solely to watch news. I feel the need to be updated just in case we are all going to die.
    Dying is important so I need to know when it is going to happen.
    .......and how of course. Teleblabbers (reporters) always seem to know how I am going to die.

    I don't remember news being stupid when I was younger.
    When did it get stupid? When did teleblabbers get stupid?

    At the moment in my area we are having several cases of kids getting mumps.
    My God you would think Ebola was invading every child's bedroom.
    They are showing pictures of kids with mumps. They are talking to the parents of kids with mumps.
    We have local doctors on tv talking about mumps. They are smart. They know mumps.
    I am sure if they could they would talk directly to mumps.
    This goes on 24/7 on our one lonely tv channel that has stupid news.
    I am being mumped to death.

    When I was a kid I had the mumps, measles, chickenpox and an overbite.
    Not once did I get on tv. My parents were never interviewed.
    The local childhood disease experts, all 27 of them, never went on tv.
    I feel slighted and a bit angry. I was denied being given the chance to be a victim
    and to look sad and swollen on tv. It has had a lasting affect on me.
    I think that is what caused the overbite. Our orthodontist fixed that.
    I still didn't get on tv although now I can eat an apple with the best of them.

    So, that's my little rant for the day.
    TV news is stupid. Teleblabbers are stupid.
    I am being mumped to death and it's making me stupid.

    Oh................wait.
    I just found an "off" button on the remote.
    Never mind.
    Last edited by Rickenbacher39; 12-29-2016 at 10:02 PM.
    I HAVE MEPHOBIA:
    It is the fear of becoming so awesome that the
    human race can't handle it and everyone dies.

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    To address just one of your concerns: TV reporting started going stupid about the time Dan Rather was accosted at the Democratic National Convention in Chicago in 1968.

    By the way, I never had the mumps, so I'll never get to be a celebrity. Hooray.
    Instead of banning guns, limiting freedom and taking our rights, why don't you try just leaving us the heck alone, see how that works.

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    LOL That is a terrific rant. I loved it! I didn't get to have the mumps I think I got a shot that wouldn't let me. I did get Chicken Pox didn't get on TV either but I did get to miss a few days of school.
    Thanks for taking me back to a much simpler time of life for a few minutes.
    Rickenbacher39 likes this.
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    President Donald J. Trump

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    You're looking at it the wrong way...if they are talking about mumps, YOU'RE NOT GOING TO DIE!!
    Definition of clip
    1
    : any of various devices that grip, clasp, or hook
    2
    : a device to hold cartridges for charging the magazines of some rifles; also : a magazine from which ammunition is fed into the chamber of a firearm.

    http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/clip

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    Ok now imagine paying $190 for 300 channels and Hyp-Sonic Internet and getting the same non stop reporting on Mumps! Even on the net. ARRRGGGG!
    When I moved to the south I just didn't bring my things . By the grace of GOD he brought my soul!!"No free man shall ever be debarred the use of arms." -- Thomas Jefferson
    "The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government."
    -- Thomas Jefferson

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    I'm like Rick. I had most of the childhood diseases as well. Never had an overbite though and I was on TV twice. Once for Winning a National Archery Championship and once for raising 5 grand for Jerry Lewis's telethon. We had 2 family doctors that shared an office and both were teaching doctors. I can't begin to tell you how many cute young medical students had their hands all over my youthful body. By the time I was 17, I could not only identify virtually all common illnesses but also knew what medicines to use to treat them. Both Docs were willing to sponsor me through Med school and I passed on their offers. Also had a state supreme court judge willing to sponsor me through law school that I also passed on. In retrospect, I was a blathering IDIOT. You figure with that much notoriety, I should've had a park or something named after me. But NOOOOOO. I was white so that would never happen.
    Rickenbacher39 likes this.
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    Oh great swan-diving Jonas Salk. What the bleeding festering sores are they teaching people in schools these days? Oh that's right, people get their biology lessons from starlets who've ingested half of the pharmacopia because they got bored one afternoon. Let's hear it for those Hollywood types, working off their hedonism guilt by picking some "cause" by cutting the head off a chicken and seeing where on the "jump to conclusions" mat it drops, then bleating on about that cause with emmy-winning simulincerity and about a chapstik tube's worth of "knowledge." People don't even understand that the biggest problem with the damage those synapse-fried actors has done is that it's robbed all of us of herd immunity. Back in the good old days when we weren't up to our tonsils in morons who've convinced themselves that blasted fluoride is a government plot, we all knew that a single case of mumps was no big deal because everyone was vaccinated except the hippie children being raised on yogurt and pot and consequently weren't going to make it past their sixth birthday anyway.

    But hey, it could be worse; we could have been bequeathed the greatest experiment in human governance ever conceived, and have to watch it crumble because people get less education than a pharmacists' daughter during the Khmer Rouge regime and the media is so far up their own colons they will ignore millions of dollars in foreign contributions before an election and then go ape over a foreign meddling story that doesn't even make sense after an election. We've fallen so far we lionize the guy who single handedly cost us the Viet Nam war because he couldn't tell a victory when it smacked him in the spleen. Good lord, networks used to broadcast a half hour of facts as a public service. Imagine that. Now we have networks that broadcast 24/7 to tell you less than a monosynaptic cretin could gather from google and sift for crapola in five minutes. Seriously, who gets their "news" from TV anymore? Am I the only one who didn't recognize 85% of the people who "moderated" the presidential debates? Mumps? To heck with mumps. Mix it with ebola, spread that on the doorknobs of a few well-selected brothels in New York city, and the quality of American "journalism" would skyrocket in three weeks when Darwin made his point with extra emphasis and the self-important bubbleheads had to be replaced. I remember a couple of years ago when they ran news stories about some "anchor" deciding to stand to read his teleprompter rather than sit. Big. Diaper. Filling. Deal.

    "A republic, if you can keep it" he said. Heck, we can't even keep the compulsive liars out of the news room. We barely kept one out of the Oval Office. Thank God for that, at least.
    "It is wonderful, in the event of a street fight, how few bullets seem to hit the men they are aimed at." Ranch Life and the Hunting Trail, Theodore Roosevelt, 1888

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    Things were better when we had the 6 o'clock and 11 o'clock news. They only had 2 hrs to fill per day and 1 HR was sports and weather. Now it is 24 hrs.

    The news used to put me asleep. Now it makes me mad and keeps me awake so I don't watch it. Even when something big happens they go on for hrs with no real new information. Experts, speculation, what-ifs...Then when they do learn the truth for example the OSU non shooting or Bengazi they shut up? And they always look for the same quote 'I can't believe it happened in my neighborhood, I feel unsafe, violated, terrorized'. Say something like 'hey people get mumps, it's not cancer' and you can bet you will not get your 5 seconds of fame.

    I bet a $20,000,000 government study would show that those of us that don't watch the news are happier people.

    When the tornado sirens go off I'll turn on the news. Or tell me when they prosecute a politician for doing something the rest of us go to jail for.
    http://www.mkgandhi.org/nonviolence/...he%20sword.htm

    ...When my eldest son asked me what he should have done, had he been present when I was almost fatally assaulted in 1908, whether he should have run away and seen me killed or whether he should have used his physical force which he could and wanted to use, and defended me, I told him that it was his duty to defend me even by using violence. Gandhi.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Peacemakr40 View Post
    I'm like Rick. I had most of the childhood diseases as well. Never had an overbite though and I was on TV twice. Once for Winning a National Archery Championship and once for raising 5 grand for Jerry Lewis's telethon. We had 2 family doctors that shared an office and both were teaching doctors. I can't begin to tell you how many cute young medical students had their hands all over my youthful body. By the time I was 17, I could not only identify virtually all common illnesses but also knew what medicines to use to treat them. Both Docs were willing to sponsor me through Med school and I passed on their offers. Also had a state supreme court judge willing to sponsor me through law school that I also passed on. In retrospect, I was a blathering IDIOT. You figure with that much notoriety, I should've had a park or something named after me. But NOOOOOO. I was white so that would never happen.
    Oh for goodness sake. You got a revolver built by Samuel Colt named after you. Almost. Spelling's a little off, but close enough. I'd say that counts.
    Instead of banning guns, limiting freedom and taking our rights, why don't you try just leaving us the heck alone, see how that works.

 

 
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